Time is your friend.
For a long time, it never felt like that.
It felt like something that sneaked up on me unprepared and laughed, “Gotcha.”
So many times throughout our days we wonder, “How is it already…?”
They say time flies when you’re having fun, but I can attest that when I return home from a quick errand, have one too many interruptions, or I’m scrambling through a bedtime routine with a toddler, it doesn’t feel like fun at all.
And yet—
There I was, sitting on the floor organizing totes of books, listening to my happy toddler play with his lion and a newly acquired toy (i.e. snatched from his gracious older brothers). For the umpteenth time, we had nailed the bedtime routine: dinner, bath, bottle, nighttime story. He looked at me sleepily… only to suddenly bounce up with more energy than before.
I felt discouraged, frayed and emotionally spent.
How can my daytime routines be so successful, and our nighttime routines fall apart?
Shouldn’t I be happy that my toddler is happy?
Time is just a made-up construct, right?
Secretly, I knew the truth.
I needed to tighten the system. Start routines earlier. Figure out how to ensure everyone was getting the right amount of sleep, the right amount of time with me—while also making sure I got enough time for me.
Motherhood is such a paradox.
And by the way, if you’re waiting for a magical ending where I explain how I figured it all out—this is not that kind of article. This is a shared exhale, slightly more hopeful than trauma-bonding. (Okay, maybe I’ll try to gather some tips at the end, but stay with me.)
Where was I?
Oh yes—ranting about how motherhood can make you feel like a rockstar and have you reevaluating your whole life all in the same hour.
Because here’s the thing:
We had an extremely productive day.
Everyone was fed.
All lessons were completed (can we get a hooray?). Latin did not get skipped. There were no math meltdowns.
And this all happened in the midst of a podiatry appointment, physical therapy, a library trip, and a stop at the meat market on the way home.
Oh – and my toddler had a solid three-hour nap.
Suddenly, I felt more than hopeful.
So maybe the tip is to give ourselves more grace (cliché, but true).
Maybe the tip is to make sure our schedules are realistic when we stack appointments into our homeschool days.
Maybe the tip is to count your blessings—that you have the ability to homeschool and children you actually like.
And maybe, as we rush toward an 8pm bedtime—while contemplating yet another daylight savings change just as we finally adjusted to the last one (did we lose an hour or gain one?.. I didn’t feel it)—maybe it’s time to slow down and ask: Who said 8pm is the right bedtime for toddlers anyway?
Just kidding. (Kind of.)
Is the real concern our children’s rest, or our own need for a bit of breathing room and hope for a little time to ourselves? Is this frustration about the clock striking eight or our unmet need for rest, quiet, and connection?
If it’s the latter, then perhaps the schedule truly needs a gentler reworking to get us on the calendar.
In either case, here are some questions to ponder…
- How do you measure success and productivity?
- What do you need to integrate and eliminate to achieve the results you desire?
- Where might you be expecting yourself to be superhuman?
You fill in the blank.
Maybe time isn’t something to control or conquer, fix or fuss about, but gently notice and guide us.
Maybe time is your friend.
Maybe it’s not laughing at us after all.
Maybe it’s inviting us to loosen our grip—just a little—and notice that even when things feel messy, loud, and unfinished…
Just maybe…
