Before You Choose the Curriculum

A simple place to begin when you’re homeschooling through high school

If you’re approaching the high school years with a knot in your stomach, you’re certainly not the first homeschool parent to feel that way.

A few years ago, I played a Family Feud-style game with homeschool leaders at a national conference. You probably know the show: survey 100 people, then see which answers come up most often. I had surveyed 100 homeschool families from across the country, representing all levels of homeschooling experience.

One of my questions was: “What is your greatest fear in homeschooling?” The number-one answer wasn’t a particular subject. It wasn’t socialization. It wasn’t curriculum.

It was some variation of: “I’m afraid I’ll mess up my kids.”

The answers underneath that response were remarkably familiar: What if I don’t teach enough? What if I forget something my child really needs to know? Will he be able to get into college? What if I’m not smart enough to homeschool through high school?

Different words, but essentially the same fear: What if I get this wrong?

I understand that fear. I’ve homeschooled 17 children myself, and I’ve spent more than three decades helping other families navigate the homeschool journey. I’ve learned something along the way:

The high school years don’t have to begin with panic. They can begin with a plan.

And surprisingly, that plan doesn’t begin with a curriculum catalog.

Start With the Big Picture

Before you start comparing biology textbooks or deciding whether your student needs Algebra II, take a step back and ask a more important question:

What do we want these high school years to accomplish?

As Christian parents, our answer can be bigger than simply preparing a student for college or a career. We have the privilege of discipling our children and helping them grow into the young men and women God created them to be.

We want them to grow in wisdom and character, learn to think and work diligently, develop practical skills, serve others, and recognize and use the gifts God has given them.

That doesn’t mean every family will make the same choices. College may be in the picture. Or perhaps a trade, military service, entrepreneurship, ministry, an apprenticeship, or employment.

So before choosing the road, consider where you’re going—and, even more importantly, who you want your graduate to become.

Ask yourself:

• What are our family’s priorities and values?
• What does our state require?
• What are this student’s strengths, interests, and needs?
• What might this student want to pursue after graduation?
• What knowledge, skills, and experiences would help prepare him or her for that future?
• What kind of young adult are we praying and working toward?

Those questions will give you a much better foundation for planning than simply asking, “What curriculum should I buy?”

Remember: Your Teenager Is Not a Generic Student

One of the great advantages of homeschooling through high school is the ability to personalize the education.

Two teenagers in the same family may need very different high school programs. One may love literature and history and dream of college. Another may be fascinated by mechanics and learn best by doing. One may thrive on traditional coursework, while another comes alive when given a real-world project.

That doesn’t mean lowering standards. It means recognizing that education is about preparing a person, not simply completing a list. This isn’t about checking off boxes for four years so your teenager can then start his or her real life. This is real life now.

High school can include traditional courses, but it can also include dual enrollment, apprenticeships, work experience, community involvement, projects, travel, independent study, and other meaningful learning experiences.

Sometimes the most valuable learning doesn’t look much like a textbook. So don’t let the fear of creating the “perfect transcript” cause you to create a high school experience that isn’t right for your teenager. Instead, ask: “What would a meaningful high school education look like for this particular young person?” Then create that and document it well.

You Don’t Have to Teach Everything

Here’s another question I hear frequently: “What if my child wants to take a subject I don’t know how to teach?”

Welcome to homeschooling high school!

You don’t have to personally know everything your teenager will ever need to know. As our children grow, our role can gradually change. We become facilitators, coaches, mentors, and even fellow learners.

Your student can work with a tutor, take an online course, participate in a co-op, enroll in a community college or dual-credit class, or learn from a mentor who has expertise in an area you don’t.

Your job isn’t to be the world’s greatest teacher in every subject. Your job is to help your teenager learn how to learn and to provide the resources and guidance needed along the way.

Eventually, the goal is a young adult who can seek wisdom, find reliable information, ask good questions, work diligently, and continue learning independently.

Give Yourself Permission to Adjust

A high school plan is a blueprint—not a contract.

You may begin freshman year convinced that your student will follow one path and discover two years later that his interests have changed completely.

That’s okay.

A teenager who thought she wanted to be an artist may discover that she loves nursing. A student who thought college was the goal may discover that an apprenticeship is a better fit. Another may begin high school with little direction and gradually discover a passion through hands-on experiences.

Have a plan, but hold it loosely. Your teenager may discover new interests, new opportunities may come along, and sometimes God may lead you in a direction you didn’t expect.

Sometimes the detour turns out to be part of the journey.

So Where Do You Begin?

If you’re staring at a blank page wondering how on earth you’re going to plan four years of high school, don’t try to plan four years today. Start with one piece of paper. At the top, write your student’s name, then make three sections:

Our Family: What do we value? What do we hope our graduate will know, believe, and be able to do?

Our Student: What are this student’s strengths, interests, challenges, gifts, and goals?

Our Destination: What possibilities are we considering after graduation? What requirements or preparation might those paths involve?

Don’t choose the curriculum yet. Just think. Talk with your teenager. Pray together. Dream a little. Research the possibilities. Then begin building your plan from there.

And remember: you don’t have to figure everything out at once.

I’ve watched families enter the high school years absolutely terrified that they weren’t qualified to do this—and I’ve watched those same families discover that their teenagers could thrive when given the freedom, support, and guidance homeschooling provides. I’ve watched students discover gifts their parents didn’t know they had.

That’s one of the things I love most about homeschooling high school: It’s not just about academics. You’re helping a young person grow toward adulthood.

We can look to Jesus’ own childhood as a beautiful picture of balanced growth: “And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man.”  —Luke 2:52

Our goal isn’t merely a well-educated student. It’s a young person who is growing in wisdom, developing strength and maturity, walking with God, and learning to live well with others.

So take a deep breath. You don’t have to recreate the local high school in your home or have every semester planned before ninth grade. You just need to take the next step.

Make a plan. Pray over it. Hold it loosely. Learn alongside your teenager. Adjust when you need to. And when that little voice starts whispering, “What if I mess up my kid?” – remember this:

You don’t have to do this perfectly. You just have to do it faithfully.

That’s a much better place to begin.